Why I Hate The Test (written 2010)

So as merit pay comes back up, I think it only fair to explain why I hate the test. I borrowed this, but it sums up my feelings perfectly.
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A kid raises his hand during the drill-and-kill test. "I'm supposed to find the main idea of a book that is about the desert, but the options are Cactus Heat, By the Ocean and Mountain Drought and Shrinking Ice Caps. All of these will work. Chile has a desert that's nestled right up against the ocean. Mountains have deserts, too. And one of the largest deserts is freezing cold. Hasn't the test-maker ever heard of Antarctica? See, a desert isn't simply hot and flat. It's about precipitation."

On another test, he asks, "I'm supposed to say how many people will be at the party. If I'm not counting myself, this works out just fine. But if I'm not then it won't work. The test question doesn't ask, but I think it's rude to not attend your own birthday party." He's right. The correct answer could be 12 or 13, which is B or C.

He raises his hand five times when the question reads, "Which is the best question for . . . " and says, "They're making the subjective into something objective. Why can't they just let me write my own question and judge that instead?"

No one asks him to defend his answers. No one gives him a chance to clarify a question. Given his special education accommodations, I can re-read a question but I can't explain it. The system is set up to efficiently measure critical thinking and few people seem to question whether higher order questioning belongs with a low-order format (multiple choice).

I don't deny that he has a hard time reading. His mind meanders in often bizarre directions. Thus, he is able to answer a critical thinking question, but miss a simple comprehension question. He over-analyzes answers that he believes are vague. In math, he can explain a complex concept and then make a simple math error that ruins the entire problem.

When the test is over, he draws a scene from The Shining. I ask him about it later. "The Jack Nicholson guy is a politician and the students are saying red rum and the politicians look really scared. They're living out of fear and the kids are scared too. But it's not until the politicians look at themselves in the mirror that they realize that they are the ones killing our education."

According to the Galileo, he doesn't understand theme or symbolism or metaphor. He earned a sixty percent, which will drop his A in reading down to a C. I'm not suggesting that this story resembles most students. Yet, I have seen many students who fit this criteria. They are great thinkers and lousy test takers. (For the record, I'm a decent thinker and a great test taker, which is why I ended up in honors classes and some of my smartest friends were overlooked)

I used to believe that if I taught kids well, they could pass the test. I thought that I didn't have to teach to the test in order for them to pass it. I believed critical thinkers were smarter than test-makers. I'm having second thoughts about all of those presuppositions.

But I'm still banking on this hope: that some of the kids who fail the test will find a way to succeed in life.