So here are some things I WANT to say, but can’t…how can I say these things more diplomatically?
- My fertility/ infertility/ decision to have children is frankly none of your business, and while I know you were just making polite conversation, I am sensitive about this, so I’ll thank you to keep your nose out of my uterus.
2. You are too crazy for me to talk politics with. I don’t know if it is the fact that you seriously think Glenn Beck/ Rush/ Trump/ Palin/ Sean Hannity should win presidency or that you talk openly about conspiracies on 9/11 and call people from any country (other than Canada or England) “Them” that freaks me out more. Whatever the case—you are a politico-insaneo. Get away from me.
3. I can’t talk to you with that mole/booger/ thing in your teeth /zit. I keep staring at it. I’m trying to stop, really. I can’t stop. Moley-moley-mole-don’tsaymole-IjustsaidmoleMOLE!
4. Don’t ask me about views on education unless you plan to listen. Want a fairytale that every thing is hunky-dorey? Watch 90210 and eff off.
5. I really like you and respect you, but sometimes I’m a douchebag. If I get too douchey, please have the decency to tell me to stop being a d-bag. I’ll comply.
Ok- stopping there because my d-bag meter is going off. Ok—suggestions? Numbers 1,2 are the hardest for me. Thanks all!
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